I went back to Berlinale for the first time since the pandemic. It was the first time that I travelled Berlin by train since I inter-railed as a student in 2000. I took the coach from Bournemouth to Victoria, then tube to St Pancras, then Eurostar to Brussels, then ICE to Cologne, then another ICE to Berlin. And the same in reverse coming home. The journey was pretty gnarly, especially on the way out, where each train arrived only minutes before the next was to leave. Still, a positive experience, and I don’t have the guilt of flying which I usually get.
The festival experience was a mixed bag this year. I didn’t have a particular project in mind so I didn’t invest in a European Film Market (EFM) accreditation. Back in 2020 I went on a day pass, but they’ve been discontinued and it didn’t seem worth getting a full pass with no particular project to hawk. I managed to catch up with quite a few contacts though, and hopefully will get some work out of it. However, the cost of being in Berlin has gone up dramatically, and I can’t say that the return on investment of going there will be worth it at this point. On the positive side, I managed to see some films while there, which doesn’t always happen!
The changes to Berlin felt a bit more pronounced this time. Obviously it changes over the years, but the things that made it so distinctive seem to have disappeared, and much of it feels like any other city these days. Perhaps I am just lamenting a past, wishing for the Berlin of my twenties (as well as wishing for my twenties). Perhaps it is similar to my recent experience of London, where the spaces and places that I am fond of have changed. Why should they stay preserved? Well, in Berlin’s case, it feels like the spirit of the city has changed with the development. I miss some of the dingy dive bars and cheap restaurants.
That said, I had a party with some of my students during Berlinale. They all seemed to be having a good time. They are living their twenties. And if they don’t remember a different version, why would it feel any better or worse?
Berlin, and specifically Berlinale, has held an important place in my life for a variety of reasons. I’ve visited the city for over 20 years and shared some incredible times there with different friends and partners. We screened the first 72 project there in February 2009 and got the contract for Melbourne International Film Festival in the foyer of the Marriott (thanks to Miriam Allen putting in a good word). I was selected for Berlinale Talents in 2013 and got funding in the EFM for a new 72 in Derry until Bee got ill. And I’ve taken many students over the last ten years, given lectures, attended conferences, played a few gigs (wrote a song about it), had quite a few hangovers, and lots of wonderful memories. But life moves on. I’m not sure where it goes from here, but it certainly feels at the moment as if one era has come to an end, and it is uncertain if another one follows it. I don’t feel like I can visit the festival in the way I used to, as an opportunity for an independent filmmaker to find some work, if the price keeps going up in a way that can’t be recouped. Only time will tell if this year’s investment was worth it or not. I’m thankful for the opportunity that I had to spend some time with friends around the festival, and I’m sure I’ll find ways to keep those connections going.
